Please
by hitori.no.boku
Summary: Anko knew she wouldn't let him go. Couldn't let him go. Because waking up in the arms of Uzumaki Naruto had been the best moment in her life.


Please

Disclaimer: Never owned 'Naruto'. Just playing around with the characters for awhile…

* * *

"Please don't go…"

That's what it started with. That's what rooted him in his place as he began to walk out the door. Three, soft words, filled with want and desperation and sadness. Filled with pain. Three words that came out so full of emotion…so full of pleading.

He took his hand off the doorknob, his feet pivoting as he slowly turned around.

She was lying in bed, looking at him, eyes boring into his own.

"Please…"

Her mouthed moved, her scarred and rough lips opening and closing, calling out to him.

Naruto stared, watching her shift, her lithe body moving underneath the sheets. He never would have expected this… Not from her of all people… She was independent, she didn't cling on to anything, didn't want anyone to lean on, didn't need anyone. But now…the tone in her voice…filled with pain and desperation…

She was begging. Begging him to stay.

"Please…please don't leave yet…"

He couldn't imagine how hard it was for her to do this… How hard it was for her to show him this side… To show him this little weakness. Naruto's heart clenched. Her of all people… One of the most feared Jounin in the village…pleading with him…

He hated himself.

Light was beginning to peak through the window, bathing her face in a glow. Her eyes were shining and Naruto could see the emotion glistening in her irises. He tore his stare away and glanced out the window, noting that the sun was rising. It was almost morning. His eyes fluttered back to her as she moved underneath the sheets, her legs stretching out and his pupils traced her form, so clear and so enticing under the thin cream fabric. There was a lump in his throat now and he opened his mouth to speak but paused, nothing coming to mind that was good enough to tell the purple haired woman lying in bed.

She was getting to her knees now, one hand gripping the sheets close to her body and the other bracing against the firm mattress underneath. She never took her eyes from him. His lips touched as he closed his mouth. She knew what he was about to say. He could tell. And now he could see the glimmer of sadness melting its way her body. He struggled to swallow and he almost stumbled over his words.

"I can't… You kn-"

There was a sigh, a loud, resigning sound in the air as she cut him off. She grimaced and the bitterness in her voice, no matter how thinly veiled, was apparent.

"I know."

He saw her fist clench against the bed and her whole posture slumped. Naruto licked his lips, slowly mouthing out his words.

"You can't risk it…"

She looked down, finally breaking her gaze away from him. Her words were soft.

"Maybe…maybe next time…"

There was a silence, a long awkward pause and Naruto shifted. He looked at her, then down, then back at her, at a loss of what to say. He couldn't stay… Not when…

The woman looked up at him for a brief moment, pulling the sheets tighter around her body. The sun was higher now; more of its light poking through her window and the whole room was now almost bathed in the soft yellow glow. She opened her mouth, soft pink tongue darting out to wet her chapped lips.

"You should go Naruto…"

Her voice was raspy now, a worn and tired quality easing its way into her vocal cords.

"…Before anyone finds out."

The blonde nodded uncertainly, looking at her for re-assurance. She turned her head, merely waving a hand, ushering him out the door. He started, looking back at her once more and sadness welled its way up into his heart.

It shouldn't have been like this.

His hand was on the doorknob again and his fingers gripped it.

"I'll see you tonight right…?"

The woman whispered a yes, and the blonde nodded to himself, his azure eyes fixed on the floor.

"Alright… Bye then…"

The door opened. His figure was in the doorway. Outside. Gone.

* * *

She watched him go, the image burned into her head. The door shut with a soft click and there was silence in her room.

'What the fuck is wrong with me...'

Anko slumped back against the bed

She should have been used to this by now. Should've been used to him leaving in the early morning. What the hell was she doing begging? After all, she was the one who had suggested it. She was the one who had told him in the first place. But things were so much different now. It wasn't just casual anymore, at least not to her… It wasn't just some fling to her anymore… It was more than that dammit. And every single time he left it hurt, like a blade of steel straight through her chest. It hurt, really, really bad.

And she hated it. Hated herself for putting them both through this. She knew he was hurt when they'd first started, but for the sake of being professional…for the sake of following the rules, she'd brushed it off. Now they'd fallen into this routine…into this rut, this silly, stupid, ridiculous rut. And she hated that too.

She wanted him. She needed him. But she couldn't even tell him beyond a weak "don't leave." Pathetic. And it's not like that blonde haired idiot would get the message.

Last night…. Last night had been amazing… Every night with him was amazing… But the mornings that came after…

Waking up with Naruto…

She loved it. More than anything. She felt needed, felt wanted, felt protected, loved. And that made her the happiest. **He** made her the happiest.

Until he had to leave. Then she was crushed and all the feelings of abandonment and loneliness and sadness came rushing back, the euphoria of being with Naruto gone, leaving her blank and emotionless.

'I know I can't…But every time…Every single time…'

She'd always been alone. Always been an outcast. And after Orochimaru, things just got worse. Shunned, hated by the populace of Konoha and looked down upon by the shinobi. They laughed, talked behind her back. Snake bitch. Snake slut.

They wished her dead. Wished she would end up in a ditch somewhere, rotting corpse picked upon by carrion. They didn't want her around, not the people and especially not the council.

She was a reminder of their failures. A reminder of something that had gone terribly wrong. And they hated that. The elders hated that she still existed, that she was an image of everything Orochimaru was and everything they had failed to do. And without the Sandaime around to stick up for her… Suffice to say, things had taken a turn for the "even worse".

And then he showed up.

Anko stared up at the ceiling.

Out of the fucking blue like a god damn messiah.

She'd met him after three years on the road. And he'd come back battler hardened, jaded and cynical. During that time he'd grown up. He wasn't the loudmouthed idiot who liked to place his trust in everyone. Now he was in the big leagues and he acted accordingly. Jiraiya officially was still in charge of the now, cold, blue eyed ninja and even though Kakashi was still around, Naruto refused to be put back on Team Seven. So Jiraiya had opted to stick him under the supervision of another Jounin for a short period of time. A short period of time became something much longer than any of them had expected.

Imagine Tsunade's surprise when she received reports citing that Mitarashi Anko, of all people and not Jiraiya, was training Uzumaki Naruto. Training…and a whole lot of other things.

Vandalism. Bar hopping. Chain smoking. And on top of that, large scale destruction of training grounds. Soon they were the talk of Konoha. Infamous.

They made an incredibly large mess, the two of them together. And Jiraiya, as their commanding officer, neither reprimanded them nor told them other wise.

The Hokage on the other hand, had much to say about their exploits.

Anko could still remember the furious tongue lashing the three of them had been subject to after Shizune had caught them getting absolutely plastered in a seedy downtown Konoha bar. She grimaced. The look fury on Tsunade's face hadn't been directed at Naruto, or Jiraiya. It had been straight at her. If looks could kill, Tsunade would have slaughtered her ten times over.

That didn't stop them. Anko and Naruto didn't care. They toned it down a little, and then they kept doing it.

Drink. Train. Smoke. Train. Drink. Drink. Drink. Train. Sleep. Over and over and over again. She would beat the living hell out of him. And he would come back time and time again.

That's what they did. Day in and day out. Training became a routine. And their routine became life.

And after a while…

It was that and just a bit more.

Soon training became a tease. And her shirt would fall loose and her cleavage would press together. Soon a tease became seduction. And her hands would linger just a bit longer, her body rubbing against his. Soon seduction became a game. And she would feel him pressed against her, feel him throbbing. Soon Anko had Naruto pinned down. And Naruto would lie still, taking in the smirk on her face. Soon Naruto's hands began to wander. And Anko would shiver at his touch. Soon they were pressing against each other. And blood and sweat and work gave way to passion. Soon Anko's face was inches from his. And the alcohol tinting their breath made it so much more real.

And this continued on…

Soon they were in ecstasy, her back arched as his lips danced over her neck. Biting. Licking. And his hands would glide across her body, wandering over her scarred pale skin. Touching. Teasing. Playing. Soon their lips would lock, Naruto's one hand on her hip and her fingers buried in his hair. And their clothes would lie across the ground, forgotten. Soon her body was on fire, and she would moan and pull him closer. And she would savor the hard feeling of him inside of her.

Soon the seduction that was a game became something so much more different. Soon the game turned real. And they both realized that this was something they'd never expected.

And then it began to happen more frequently… More and more times, training became both of them, stripped down and moaning on the floor on Anko's apartment. Water dripping down their bodies in Anko's shower. Her breasts pressed up against a tree in a secluded training ground, gasping and Naruto grabbed her hips. Her hands pressed against his chest, cold river water running over their bodies in a shallow stream as she clenched around him.

Soon, training became release. Training became a connection.

And eventually… Anko grimaced. Eventually, the Hokage found out.

And it was the last time they'd ever done anything in public. Tsunade had been infuriated. So, so, incredibly angry. So had the council. Anko had almost been stripped of her special jounin status and Naruto had been on the way to having his genin status revoked. Only timely intervention by Jiraiya had stopped both.

So instead of losing both of their ranks, the council gave her an ultimatum.

They didn't want the snake bitch consorting with the demon boy. That just wouldn't do.

Keep away from the boy. Keep away from him. You don't deserve to be with someone. You deserve to be alone. Orochimaru's play thing. That's all you are. You'll never be anything better. Keep away from Naruto. Keep away from the demon. Neither of you deserve happiness.

That's what they'd told her. And to keep her in line, to keep her trapped and keep her choice less, they held her position dangling over her head. Tokubetsu Jounin. ANBU Torture and Interrogation. They'd strip it all from her. Everything.

Get caught with the demon spawn, get caught doing anything with him beyond strictly professional business…and that was it.

She couldn't find a loophole around this one. Not when she was Naruto's Jounin commander, not when she was his superior officer. Konoha Shinobi law explicitly stated that no superior officer could consort with her subordinates in any way beyond team activities. If they did, the penalty could be severe.

Tsunade had her hands tied on this. She couldn't bend Konoha Military Law for her, not even for Naruto. And even if she could do anything, Anko doubted she would. She'd seen the way the blonde Hokage looked at her, see the slight disgust in her eyes. She didn't want Anko around Naruto. Not now, not ever.

She could feel the anger and frustration and loneliness build up inside her, like a balloon ready to fill and explode.

Because of them, because of the fucking people and the fucking council he'd leave every morning. They couldn't be seen together. So he'd leave her alone. And then he'd come back at night and they'd start the whole process again.

Anko gritted her teeth, nails digging in to the pillow in her hands. She couldn't stop the emotions bubbling up, couldn't stop them from reaching the surface. So what if she was his jounin officer? His commander? She didn't care dammit… She didn't care… She didn't want to be…

Her jaw clenched. She didn't want to be alone. Like she always was. Like she always had been.

Anko bit her lip, taking a deep breath. Naruto was the one person who she had a chance with… The only one. The only one who didn't look down on her, look at her like she was some tool… He knew what if felt like… Knew how it was to be ostracized from the people of Konoha. Knew what it was like to be hated… Naruto and her…they clicked with each other.

And yet…and yet she would still be alone. Her duty as a kunoichi…to follow the laws of Konoha, outweighing her personal needs. There was blood trickling down her lip now, her teeth biting deep into flesh. It wasn't fair…. She held back a choked cry.

'I can't do this…'

Let it out she told her herself.

'I can't keep this in anymore…'

So she let go. She broke down, clutching the pillow to her face as she screamed.

"Fuck fuck fuck! Ughhhh. I hate this I hate this I hate this!"

She screamed, louder and louder, the pillow almost failing to muffle the sound. Tears were beginning to gather in her eyes. But she wouldn't cry. Not her. Not her dammit.

"God dammit why! Why do I have to fucking be alone!"

Anko clenched the pillow tighter in her hands, rolling over onto her side. Her eyes were threatening to leak now so she clenched them shut, still screaming into her pillow.

"Fuck! I hate this place, I hate these people, I hate this life! Fuck this! Fuck fuck fuck fuck!"

Her last words came out as a choked sob. Her breasts heaved up and down as she struggled to catch her breath. The tears began to run, trickling slowly down her cheeks.

"God dammit…why can't I be happy…?"

Anko's heart pounded against her chest, hammering as she buried her face in the pillows. Her breath was coming in short, quick gasps now and salty liquid dripped from her eyes.

"Why…Why me…?"

She laid still, sobs wracking her body as her emotions took control. Anko let go, finally succumbing to every bit of sadness and despair that coursed through her body. She let it all out.

And for the first time in a long time…

Anko cried.

* * *

Night was falling. Darkness and inky black tendrils sweeping across the sky. Minute by minute and second by second. Light was fading quickly and soon only a silent ebony sky would be over Konoha.

Naruto walked, his black, orange trimmed pants brushing against each other as his legs moved back and forth. He glanced out from under his hood, eyes scanning his dark surroundings. His feet were noiseless as he stepped across cobblestone road leading to the apartments a short distance away.

He pulled his chakra close to him, coiling it into his body and shrouding himself in shadows as he got closer to the apartments. He'd learned quite a few things with Jiraiya.

Naruto looked around, noting the two masked ninja sitting on a building a few hundred feet away. Idly, he wondered what Tsunade would think, knowing that her elite shinobi had fallen for simple genjustu and civilian disguises.

He shook his head as he reached the grey and tan building and he began the long walk up the stairs to the fifth floor. Apartment eighty five. Anko's apartment.

It took him a few minutes, but finally Naruto reached the room. Pulling his hood back, he let his blonde hair fall freely and put a hand on the doorknob, turning it with a slight click

It opened. And he grinned as he stepped in, seeing her curled up on the couch, a blanket flung over her scantily clad body.

"Hey Anko-chan."

She looked up for a moment and Naruto barely caught the tear stains on her cheeks. His heart fell and the door shut behind him.

"Naruto…can we talk?"

He nodded uncertainly and walked to the couch. He sat down on one side, eyeing Anko as she curled tighter beneath the blanket. She opened her mouth and there was silence for a moment. Naruto listened, waiting for her to speak.

"I know…I know I'm not supposed to do this…"

He fixed his eyes on her down turned ones.

"Anko…"

She took a deep breath, setting her jaw.

"Fuck…but I've been holding this in…and I don't think I can do that anymore…"

She tilted her chin up and looked Naruto in the eyes.

"I want you Naruto. Not just for a night. Not just for a week. Or a year. I want you. Forever."

His eyes widened and Naruto's breath hitched. Anko looked determined. Determined but sad.

"I know I'm not supposed to, but I don't give a damn."

Naruto just stared, the gears in his brain working overtime to comprehend what Anko was saying. She wanted something more real… She wanted more than just flings… She wanted **him**. But what about the council… What about rules…?

"Anko…we can't…didn't you sa-"

She cut him off, and her voice came out half choked.

"I don't care what I said in the fucking past. I changed my mind. I don't want that anymore. I want you."

Her words came out, a jumbled and rushed. He stared at her. Anko's eyes were glistening, unshed tears gathering over her amber irises. Naruto didn't know what to say. So he listened as she spilled all of her thoughts and emotions out to him.

"I want you to be here in the morning dammit. I want to wake up and see your dumb face and feel my body against yours. I want you to hold me and look at me. I want to breathe your scent and hold you for as long as I want."

Anko was almost in tears now.

"Fuck the rules, fuck the council. I want you dammit. I don't ever want to let you go. Because you're the only thing that's ever made me this happy! You're the only person that's ever cared this much for me."

He leaned closer to her. They were a few feet apart and he could almost feel every bit of emotion radiating off the special jounin.

"I won't let something like this…someone like you just slip through my fucking fingers! Not when you're the only real chance at finding happiness that I'll ever really have…"

He was over her now and there was a desperate look in her eyes. Her body was quivering.

"Please, Naruto…just give me a cha-"

He closed the distance. Their lips touched.

Electricity sparked between them and their bodies burned at each others touch.

Gentle. Teasing. Rough. Passionate. Alive.

Night finally fell.

* * *

Silence.

And then a rustle of sheets and blankets. A contented sigh. He could feel her shift against him. Naruto opened one blue eye, squinting at the light pouring through the side window of her bedroom.

Silence.

She pressed her body against his and Naruto's mouth creased into a small smile. Her head was resting on his chest. He could feel her take a breath, her mouth opening. Her voice came out rough.

"…Naruto….?

The blonde leaned down and nuzzled her, signaling that he was listening. The older woman continued.

"…If I go back to sleep…and I wake up…will you still be here…?

Silence.

"…Yeah…yeah I will Anko-chan..."

Silence.

His arms tightened, curling around her body. A soft smile graced Anko's lips and her amber eyes shined. Anko buried her face into his blonde locks and let herself relax. She didn't have to worry about him leaving. Not this time. And if she had it her way, not ever.

Anko knew she wouldn't let him go. Couldn't let him go. Because waking up in the arms of Uzumaki Naruto had been the best moment in her life. And she was sure of that. Her smile widened.

Life was good.

Minutes passed and she lay still, taking in the comfortable silence. She could hear him breathing; feel his chest lift up and down. Anko listened, could hear his heart thump and slowly but surely, her lids began to droop. Who cared if it was almost afternoon? Anko arched herself against Naruto.

Her eyes closed. Her heart beat.

She finally felt **alive**.

Anko was finally **happy**.

* * *

-Fin-

AN: Complete? After a long time away from writing...I think I did a decent job. Do you?


End file.
